Finally...I have started a blog!!!

Well...Terri, I hope you are happy. I finally found some time to begin a blog. I am not sure how faithful I will be, but we'll see! This will give me the opportunity to share some pictures of my angel, Mollie.

I thought I would start off this blog by sharing my testimony about Mollie, so here it goes...

When we started trying to conceive Mollie I just took it for granted that we would have no problem. I just assumed that we would try for a couple of months and that would be it. God apparently had other plans in mind. At first I didn't think much about it, but then it soon became apparent that there was some sort of issue. I had confided in my close friends and family who all had similar advice..."just relax and it will happen", "ask your doctor to put you on clomid", "it will happen when you least expect it", etc. At first this advice was reassuring but soon became discouraging because for those who know me will say that I am a planner and my frustration in "my plan" not working out was driving me CRAZY! It seem as if everyone was getting bitten by the pregnancy bug, but Jason and I. Some of these people who were getting pregnant were dear friends, and though I was so happy for them, my heart ached for the joy of carrying my own child.

I finally went to visit my OB/GYN who gave me the infamous clomid that I had heard wonderful success stories about. I took several rounds of clomid with no luck. Jason and I finally decided after much prayer to have an evaluation from a reproductive/endrocronologist. His name was Dr. Nichols (I HIGHLY recommend him). After several tests, it was determined that I had an elevated FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) level. This is what women in early menopause often experience. Basically your body (ovaries) is not functioning normally and is not producing healthy, normal eggs. The doctor explained that the prognosis was not that great and the chance of us conceiving a baby was slim. As one can imagine, this was VERY devastating news. Jason and I prayed, prayed, and prayed for God's love, support and his perfect plan. Dr. Nichols prescribed Femara (similar to clomid) and instructed Jason when and how to give me a one time injection (yikes!). I was very nervous about the shot being administered by Jason, but he did a great job and was so proud of himself that he jokingly referred to himself as "Dr. Miller" for the next few days.

The following week after taking the round of Femara and receiving the injection we went to the beach for a week. Jason's parents came down for part of the week and we finally told them the issues we were having (I had already told my parents) and explained that we were probably going to adopt a child because we couldn't imagine not having a child to share our lives with. They were very understanding and explained that we would have their support with any decision that we made. God had given Jason and I a wonderful peace that week. We finally came to the realization that we were probably not going to have our own children and we were somehow able to accept it.

We came back from the beach on a Saturday afternoon. The next day I got up to begin getting ready for church. I decided to take a pregnancy test as this had become a weekly routine for me. To my surprise, and after two years, there were FINALLY two lines indicating a positive result. We were pregnant!!! I rushed out of the bathroom to tell Jason and we both shared laughter and tears. Somehow we managed not to tell our families until the next day. I wanted to make sure of my results with a blood test from the doctor before sharing our wonderful news.

The doctor told us that he had been in practice for many years and had only seen a few couples with my problem be able to conceive. What a blessing!

This is a testimony of prayer, faith, and patience. God truly answers prayers. Mollie is proof of that and I am reminded of that often when she looks at me with her bright, brown eyes. I learned through all of this that my plan was not God's plan. We do not have control over our lives even though most believe that they do. I learned that you must place your trust and faith in God's hands because he has the most perfect plan. It has worked out beautifully to have had Mollie now as opposed to my "original plan" because we are more financially stable, Jason has been very successful which has allowed me to stay home with Mollie. I don't know if I could have been a stay-at-home if my plan would have worked out. Also, I know that prayer is very powerful. Jason and I prayed faithfully for this child and when we informed others of our situation, they also lifted us up in prayer and for that we are very thankful.

On March 14, 2007, we got to meet our miracle, Mollie Kathryn Miller. She is beautiful and perfect in every way. We are so thankful for her and are so incredibly grateful to our Heavenly Father. PRAISE THE LORD!